DAVID HILLE would like to be the captain of Essendon again one day. He understands that Matthew Lloyd likes the job and he knows that by the time his turn arrives, the club might look instead to someone a bit younger. But Hille hopes his day will come. "It's a point I'd like to return to," he says.

It was two years ago yesterday that Hille sat beside Kevin Sheedy at a Wednesday afternoon media conference, becoming the Essendon captain. Matthew Lloyd had torn his hamstring from the bone, the Bombers needed a new leader and the coach was explaining why his young ruckman was being thrown in.

Hille was 24 and an 89-game player. For most of those games he had been seen as a student <0x2014> to Paul Salmon, Steve Alessio and John Barnes. Hille was, Sheedy said that day, still learning, and always wanting to learn. He was starting to play some good football. His was an appointment for the future, said the coach, more than the there and then.

Hille heard those words, and believed them. He has always thought that opportunities arise for a reason and that most are worth taking; even as the Bombers' 2006 season began to turn very bad, Hille knew he was learning things, that he must be learning things. But while he never felt without several layers of support, he did feel flung into something he now knows is impossible to anticipate or prepare for.

"It was an interesting experience, because I knew the club was looking into the future with that decision," Hille said. "I felt thankful for that and understood it, yet at the same time I was quite aware that there were other guys who would be seen as more deserving, and who were more deserving.

"As much as you look upon it as a chance to learn, the buck still stops with you. Or you feel that it does. If you're in that role, people are going to be critical of what you do, and you can't please everyone. The learning comes through figuring out who to be, or how to be yourself. That's the important thing, to do your own thing, to not be someone else's version of a captain but to find your own level of comfort in the role.

Did Hille do that? "In time I did, but not at first," he said. "Not for a while. The first pressure I found was that you want your performance to be the best it possibly can be, and to lead the group that way. That's what James Hird did, that's what Matthew Lloyd does, that's what those guys do. I perhaps had to realise that I wasn't going to be the best player in the team that I wasn't the best player in the team. I needed to concentrate on playing my role as best I could and understanding the dynamics of the group, what different people needed.

"Once you knew that, you could work with it , and that's definitely something I learned. I don't think I acted like myself, as much as I could have. I think I would have resonated a bit more if I had been. Although, it's funny, I still don't think I would have changed anything I did, because I wouldn't have learned anything. I was how I was, and I learnt things because of it."

He still is. When it came time to hand his title back to Lloyd last year, Hille had taken a liking to the captaincy, although there was still some balance to be struck between what he was doing and what his team needed. There are things Hille still wants to do better <0x2014> in the ruck, in the forward line and in how well he gets around the ground <0x2014> but when Sheedy called him late last year, to say he was out of the side, he had to concentrate on himself again.

At the time, Sheedy said Hille had been dropped for complaining about having to sit on the bench. Hille felt he had given the coaches no choice but to leave him out. He made his way back after one week, only to be dropped again for the final round <0x2014> Hird and Sheedy's Subiaco farewell <0x2014> before a late injury to Paddy Ryder gave him one last chance, and at the same time a new start.

"I suppose it shows that the journey doesn't stop, there's always something waiting to challenge you," Hille said. "I wasn't fit enough last year and I don't think I was intense enough last year. And when there are a lot of little things not working, you get into a spiral of non-confidence and it feeds on your form. I was on the edge for a couple of weeks before Sheeds rang me and said, 'you trained well this week but it just wasn't enough'.

"I was very, very lucky to come in for the last game and I knew that. My performance in the twos certainly didn't warrant it, but I thought I finished on a fairly strong note, and that sent me straight into pre-season for this year. I started this year then, in a sense."

Hille got much fitter over summer. His endurance levels rose, he loved the all-action nature of the pre-season sessions, and believes that it, in combination with Matthew Knights' game style, has drawn some presence and intensity out of him. He is not only making it to contests, he's making them quicker and in better shape, and he's doing it surrounded by more young players than he has ever been, a constant reminder that his leadership experience was not a one-off thing and that there is still plenty to teach and learn.

"We have a lot of young players, but a lot of teams do. The question is how quickly you bring them on, and I think that's what we as players have to help with," said Hille, who has been working most specifically with ruck recruit Tom Bellchambers. "I spent a lot of time sitting on the bench, watching how other people do things, and I still have a lot to improve in my own game. But I guess as you get older you look at other players and you have a better sense of what they need, which gives you a different perspective on your own game. Working with Tom, and working with Jason Laycock, it gets my mind thinking about what I'm doing when I'm playing the game. You consider what you're saying more, and then you go back and make sure you're applying it to yourself. It's definitely something that's working for me."

Hille feels in a better position to understand and support Lloyd, too. Three players will make their debut for Essendon today, and the team will feature seven players who have played 10 or less games. Hille feels sure they will be playing together for a long time, and that they'll have success, but he also knows that the uninjured senior players need to hang particularly tough for the next few weeks, and what Lloyd will be thinking and feeling because of that.

"For me, that's been the beauty of my experience, that now I can go back and help Matthew and understand his role and be able to say that 'OK, now I know how he's feeling, he might need help in this area and that area'," Hille said.

"That's the thing that made me realise that while I did the job for a year, it's not something that ended, and that I couldn't keep developing. It was a very positive experience for me and it's something I want to keep getting better at. By the time Matthew is done, who knows, they might be looking for someone younger and more energetic than me. But I want to be there, I want to be an option. Hopefully if I get a chance to do it again, I'll do it in a much better capacity. It's a point I'd like to return to."