CHRIS Judd spoke unemotionally and intelligently as a footballer and a civilian yesterday as he explained how the seed of his return to Melbourne was sown almost two years ago.

While Judd can make some of the most spectacular spur-of-the-moment decisions on the football field, the announcement that rocked the football world on Sunday was a long time coming.

The 24-year-old has carried his secret for almost two years without sharing it with the club or any of his teammates until Sunday.

Dressed in a sky blue tracksuit top, Judd clasped and unclasped his hands as he told a packed Doig Room he only informed girlfriend Rebecca Twigley a few months ago that the pull to return home was overwhelming.

"I've known for quite a while," Judd told the 100-plus people in the room. "It probably crystallised this year. But in my own mind in 2005, at the end of that year I sat down and thought it was going to be unlikely that I'd stay on after this contract, but you just don't know.

"You obviously change your mind about a lot of things in life and it was really only until this year that my thoughts crystallised and I realised this is more than likely going to be my last at the footy club."

Even his parents, Lisa Engel and Andrew Judd, weren't told until last Thursday when West Coast thought it was a strong chance of re-signing Chris.

Engel attracted interest with her song, Backyard Champion, dedicated to her son in 2005, after it was rejected as one of the tunes to be played in the pre-match entertainment at that year's grand final.

Judd broke his poker-faced approach when he quipped: "She's rapt. She's writing a new song called My Boy's Coming Home. I'm going to do a rap verse in it and do a little re-mix."

Flanked by unflinching coach John Worsfold and chief executive Trevor Nisbett, who said while the initial shock had passed it was now a business arrangement to get the best possible deal, Judd explained how tough it was to keep the secret from his teammates.

"It was really hard," Judd said. "Especially (not telling) blokes like Kerry or Coxy or Glassy. A lot of blokes who I really like as friends and have the utmost respect for.

"That was difficult but by the same token, no one asked me, so it didn't come up. The players gave me the respect and realised it was simply my decision and they were going to respect that. I didn't get asked during the year and really didn't get asked before I came in and met John yesterday."

Judd, whose press conference was attended by most of the Eagles staff and about half the squad, will become the highest-paid player in the AFL, no matter which Melbourne club takes him. He tackled that as well as any issue raised yesterday by providing a brief glimpse into his more private thoughts.

"I guess it just illustrates that when you are an AFL footballer, football still just does make up one part of your life," he said.

"You're still a son, a friend, a brother. You're not just a footballer. It's sometimes hard to understand that, from the outside looking in, that people have got other aspects of their life. At times like this it opens up people's eyes and the reasons I'm moving home are not related to football."

At all times Judd responded much like he plays his football, in control and unflustered.

"I haven't cried," he said. "I'm not a big crier. I thought I was going to get a bit teary when I started off in here, but thankfully I still have my street cred intact. It's been really sad. It's been a very hard few days. It's really hard leaving and there is an empty feeling, but that's life."